Saturday, November 26, 2011
Psalm 30:5
Weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.
Psalm 34:18
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit
May the peace be with our inner self.
♥our lips must always be sealed
5:08 PM
I don't believe in miracle and there won't be one.Been a week the last time I saw you.
If I say I didn't miss you, it is a lie. But, I can't really tell you that much.
It sucks to come to know I miss you so often but maybe not as much as you miss me.
Trying to be strong like nothing has ever happened, it is so hard. I can sense that people around me can tell the different I have changed. It is very obvious and I realized it too.
Sometimes I just want to cry out in font of someone who really understand my plight without uttering a word or going into details and the person is just you.
The text you send me this morning made me so happy, it seems like you know I am waiting for it.
People may think our relationship is just a year thing and can get over easily.
I think we have gone too deep that is why it matters the most.
It gonna take the longest time, this time I don't know how long.
I wouldn't expect too much because I am the one letting you go and pushing you out of my life.
I shouldn't be upset or trying to figure out who have you gone out with or which girl you are chatting with because I know I don't have the right now.
Sometimes it just hurt like mad.
Hoping we can get through this hardship, somehow, someday.
Will be busy for the next whole week cause I am gonna work for 6 days before my off.
Really do hope nothing interrupts it, I just taken one MC few days ago, very emotionally hurt like hell!!!
Haven't been involve with ADC stuff for quite a long time, this 30th will be the combined PT, guess I should drop by if I get to swap my shift.
Adventure race in January so have to train my stamina too.
In the meantime, I was appointed to be the leader organizing Ward year End Party.
Thank God everything is sorted out now, venue and food.
Just need to have a rough idea about the itinerary and decorations.
Thankful to have a bunch of supportive colleague. I know they are people who may not like it but, those are only a small bunch of them maybe just a handful. Doesn't really matter.
It is their decision to behave like this. Who cares!!
Having the chance to plan this event sort of helping me building up my strength and confidant.
Thanks for my bosses' trust in me. Thought they may get some senior to do it. But hey! i can do it too... being this active made me happy too.
♥our lips must always be sealed
4:33 PM
Friday, November 25, 2011
Lyrics:
Yesterday I died; tomorrow's bleeding
Fall into your sunlight
The future's open wide beyond believing
To know why hope dies
And losing what was found, a world so hollow
Suspended in a compromise
But the silence of this sound is soon to follow
Somehow sundown
And finding answers
Is forgetting all of the questions we call home
Passing the graves of the unknown
As reason clouds my eyes with splendor fading
Illusions of the sunlight
A reflection of a lie will keep me waiting
With love gone for so long
And this day's ending
Is the proof of time killing all the faith I know
Knowing that faith is all I hold
And I've lost who I am, (i'm waiting)
and I can't understand (and fading)
Why my heart is so broken, (and holding)
rejecting your love, (love) without, (onto these tears)
love gone wrong; lifeless words carry on (i am crying)
But I know, all I know's that the end's beginning (i'm dying tonight)
who I am from the start, (i'm waiting)
take me home to my heart (and fading)
Let me go and I will run, (and holding)
I will not be silent, (silent) all this time (onto these tears)
spent in vain; wasted years wasted gain (i am crying)
All is lost but hope remains and this war's not over (i'm dying tonight)
There's a light, there's a sun (i'm waiting...)
taking all these shattered ones
To the place we belong (i am waiting...)
and his love will conquer all
Yesterday I died; tomorrow's bleeding
Fall into your sunlight
♥our lips must always be sealed
2:56 PM
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Spend 3 hours at saloon.
Decided to curl my hair after seeking opinion form my hairdresser.
Just, didn't have time to dye it.
Also, just realized it has been 3 years I have her to do my hair. The only person I trust when come to hairdo. hahaha...
Have bangs and straightened it and now my hair is long enough to curl... yay!! <3
♥our lips must always be sealed
11:01 PM
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Pretty stressed up like fuck! I have never yelled at anyone before... never! Never to anyone close to me or love me. FUCK!!! seriously... Why things turn out this way. I don't mind giving up my life now. It is very pain living this way. I don't know how to face both people. I make them upset, suffered, heartbroken, dying... I am just too sinful to be in this world and to be accepted by people.
Don't make a person full of hatred and sadness.
Fuck My Life. That's it!
I miss my real smile and the way I am. I missed how I use to be.
I've turned into someone I am unsure of. Being controlled by some force. Damn!!
It seems like I've lost everything too.
♥our lips must always be sealed
10:08 PM
Sunday, November 20, 2011
[late post]
Hey there... Finally a break from te ward for a short gateaway to Batam with Stella on 17 & 18 Nov. A last minute plan on which destination as we were waiting for better deal at deal dot sg. It was a great trip tho, stuck in Turi Bearh Resort. Kind of relaxing and a romantic place to be at.
Took an hour long ferry from Tanah Merah Terminal to Batam Terminal. Warm welcome
by Turi Beach staff and transported by a van to the resort. Process our check in. Thought of upgrading but it's too expensive, need additional $128. Hang out in our room, thought of napping but end up playing monopoly, the card version. Next, we had lunch and tour around the resort. We decided to go for massage too, pick the type of massage we ant and make appointment immediately.
There is beach outside and along it has hammock too. Very nice scenery and weather that day is good. We had a late sumptuous lunch, total is $36. Kinda reasonable. They have nice dessert, Es Tellar.
Next we found two swimming pools, Aqua pool and Emerald pool. Stella was so eager to swim. Next we changed into swimwear and jump into the pool. Not long later, time for massage. I was feeling hungry while doing massage, that's extremely weird. Can't wait for it to be over because I'm quite ticklich with massage on my body. Next up is tepanyaki dinner then chill out till late night chatting. Ordered some cocktail but I ordered orange juice, can't really consume alcoholic beverage. I received SingTel signal on and off and certain places especially in the restaurant. So wish dear was with us there. I know we can't to be too greedy to ask for more sometimes.
Well, met up with dear when I back in Singapore. Great date with him. He is having his AL yet no plan. Hoping that he is not too upset by it.
It's
20-11-2011, just changed my phone wallpaper to a new Christmas tree that we saw together at CCK.
♥our lips must always be sealed
1:51 AM
